How to move on: Lessons from a heartbreak survivor

Moving on is similar to slowly adding water drops to an empty bucket. Every drop stands for a healthy activity that facilitates the moving-on process. For instance, journaling, following your passions, and participating in social activities rather than spending the entire day in bed moping around depressed.

While filling the bucket (moving on), each drop will seem insignificant in the early stage of the journey (especially immediately after the break up). Even though you may now forgive your ex, the pain of the breakup will still be fresh in your mind.

The fact that you have forgiven those who wronged you, today, does not guarantee that painful thoughts and memories won't resurface again.

On some days, many drops will fall into the bucket; on others, it might only be one.

That’s why you need to be very gentle and patient with yourself when healing. One day the bucket will be filled up to the brim.

And this is how you will know that total forgiveness has occurred. You'll remember those who have wronged you and feel nothing but the desire to wish them well.

Final Thoughts

Forgive them for the broken promises, the heartbreaking attitudes, and all the moments when they made you question your self-worth. Forgive them even though they never acknowledged the pain they caused you.

Forgive them—from the bottom of your heart—for the days they made you feel worthless, stupid, and suicidal. For your own sake, forgive them whether they deserve it or not.

It will help if you forgive because you deserve what’s on the other side of regret, anger, revenge, resentment, and pain of the past. The bitterness that comes with resentment and having thoughts of revenge—although understandable—comes with a price. And that price is your peace of mind, emotional freedom, and happiness.